I want to kiss the hand of anyone brave enough to invite us over with Nick too, because taking him out presents so many variables. Access – will it be easy enough for him to get to? Will he be comfortable (absolutely no guarantee of that and sadly, he is rarely comfortable anywhere, even in his own special chair, for very long) or will we have to make excuses and leave early? Will people be kind and understanding? Talk to him like a human being? I know my friends are on message but there are friends of friends who might not be…it sounds awful but you just don’t know.

And then I worry about friends’ precious possessions, their furniture, their pictures on the wall, their bathroom fixtures and our house everything is knackered anyway or moveable and in the end pretty much expendable, but I worry about him charging into someone else’s space like a bull in a china shop. I worry about safety and about him hurting himself.

So even though I long to get out of the house, go out and meet people, let Nick have different conversations and just shift our reality, it’s not exactly relaxing.

Sometimes it seems easier just to stay at home.